Nobody Puts [Bride] in a Corner
Not that bride! Image Credit: Mariah Rock Photography
Over the course of six years serving brides, their friends, families, and prospective in-laws, I made some incredible connections, learned many lessons, and felt rewarded and fulfilled most days. There are brides who particularly stand out due to their kind demeanors, their joie de vivre, their intelligence, or their patience and understanding as I navigated new territory as a small business owner. I helped brides in and out of dresses who came from just about every professional background you can imagine. There were many teachers, some performers, a few engineers, some administrative professionals, a slew in grad school, and of course many in healthcare, who always stood out to me, but especially during the pandemic. I worked with moms, some during their pregnancies, some very recently after, and some with grown children and grandchildren who attended their appointments with them. I helped women much younger than me and decades older. I heard stories of past heartbreak, movie-worthy encounters, and fairytale proposals. I listened as brides recounted losses both recent and from years past, all contributing to their feelings about a moment that was hopefully just as special as they had hoped without those prominent figures present.
I spoke with the new owners about how being in that role, one is privy to so many magical moments, but it is easy to gloss over them when perseverating on one negative experience. After 6 years, I can recall only a handful of unpleasant scenarios that have stuck with me. Most were related to family dynamics, wedding planning stress, or miscommunication and were ultimately resolved quickly. This one, however, baffled me. As with all stories involving conflict, there are at least two sides, and the truth is probably somewhere in the middle. I can only tell you what I remember being conveyed to me and only account for my own perspective, but I hope you at least find it entertaining.
It was Saturday, August 15th, 2020. We were five months into a global pandemic, our business had reopened only three months prior, and I was navigating ever changing directives, guidelines, and news reports to determine how best to keep my clients, my staff, and my 9-month pregnant self healthy and safe, amongst a general public clientele with widely varying opinions on the matter. I received a message via Instagram that a bride wanted to speak with me. I explained to her that my baby was due the next day and I likely would be unavailable to chat for a while after I entered maternity leave, so I asked if I could call her immediately. She said that would be great.
We spoke on the phone about her shopping experience. She told me multiple times that it wasn’t bad, just strange. She mentioned that her stylist stopped mid-sentence when explaining the layout of our store and the process for selecting dresses. When I later asked my stylist about this, she mentioned that the mom immediately walked in and started grabbing the dresses before sitting down and chatting with her. My stylist asked her to please not touch the dresses (we were asking guests to use hand sanitizer wipes at the time, because again, we were doing our best to keep people safe) and to listen to her spiel before getting started. The mom then would not look at my stylist, so during her explanation of things she paused a couple times to try and get her attention and connect with her. The biggest “complaint” I remember from the bride was that my stylist pushed her into a corner to take a photo of the back of her favorite dress. I knew exactly what she was talking about. We often would guide/instruct/direct/ask our brides to stand in a particular corner where the natural light shone best, so we could help them capture the dress as best as possible (and often as close to the type of lighting in which it would be photographed for all their outdoor wedding photos). I knew my stylist would never push anyone, yet I apologized that the experience felt awkward to her and asked if we could re-schedule her for a brand new appointment with a different stylist the following week, complete with champagne and a fresh start. She told me how much she appreciated my call, especially in my current state. She happily booked the follow up appointment and thanked me for righting the situation. I was so proud of myself for the way in which I handled the scenario and was excited to have her back in for another chance to provide the best experience for which my store was known.
After speaking with the bride, and in between contractions, I proceeded to write a lengthy apologetic response to the bride’s mom who had also emailed me that afternoon. I never heard back from the mom. The bride cancelled her follow up appointment with us. She found another store in a different state that carried the same dress and purchased through them. I know this, because she wrote a scathing review of my store and staff on her personal Facebook page, a screenshot of which was then sent to me.
The reason the date and time stand out so vividly in my mind is because I was having contractions and had started going into labor. I was at the hospital delivering my baby just a few hours after our phone call. The bride knew this was the case and acknowledged it. She gave me the impression that my efforts were appreciated and that me choosing to help correct the situation when I very clearly could have made an excuse to avoid it was what stood out to her about my store and our dedication to our clients. She still chose to write horrible things about my business online as opposed to giving us the second chance I had so diligently worked to earn us. I will never understand why she made that decision. I will forever be frustrated that I spent as much time and energy focusing on what I could have done better or differently when in reality I did as much as I could with the circumstances I was given. I don’t think anything else I could have said or done would have ever been enough for this bride or her mom. In reality, I don’t think she was meant to be a Loveliest bride. And that’s okay. I ended up with a beautiful, 8 lb. 1 oz. baby girl the next day instead. I think that was God’s way of reminding me where to focus my energy, and for that lesson I am grateful.
