Pursued Passion
Usually when I ask my 4-year old daughter how her day was at school, I hear “It was good.”When I poke a little more to find out if anything memorable happened, she typically tells me what she ate for lunch or whether or not she took a nap. When I push for what her favorite part of the day was, it is almost always “playing” - as if this tells me something revelatory.*
So, to say that the conversation my daughter and I had the other day stood out is beyond an understatement. As we made our short drive through the neighborhood to preschool drop off she started telling me how she and her friend were talking about their “motions” (read: emotions) the day before. She said that they talked about how taking five deep breaths helped them calm their bodies so they wouldn’t hit one another - great! I asked if this was a lesson for the whole class or if a teacher was discussing it with just the two of them. This was when she really got my attention. She let me know that this was not a conversation with a teacher, but one between my daughter and her friend. In that moment I was flooded with appreciation that so much parental work was paying off.
A few days later, I finalized my website, a resource for clients, and some social media content. It felt like the most productive day I had had in a while - like so many things had been accomplished all at once. And my mood soared. I’m still working on untangling 38 years worth of learned behavior, but as someone with perfectionistic tendencies and a personal sense of self-fulfillment often fueled by how “successful” or productive I feel, it was a good day!
Then I reflected on my conversation with my daughter and remembered how successes that seem to materialize in an instant are the result of so much work that took place before - conversations, research, practice, creative ideation, and other steps we have taken day by day. Do you tend to miss the small wins along the way to the major ones? That saying about there not being any overnight successes is cliche for a reason - there are none, yet even our own can feel that way if we don’t take the time to reflect.
This is your invitation to take a moment to pause and look back to see how far you’ve come from where you started as opposed to looking at what lies ahead. We will always create new obstacles for ourselves. This same ethos holds true for honing in our personal style. I’ve been on a journey of refining mine but will continue do so. The beauty is in the pursuit of what delights me. Working with a professional stylist can certainly help provide you a strong foundation from which to build, but the evolution of your curated wardrobe is something that takes continued curiosity and trial.
As Bob Ross said “Talent is pursued passion.” So keep pursuing, friend. No matter what process of self-discovery you’re in - whether it’s your style, your relationships, your business or career, your health, or something else - I urge you to keep going. Even when it feels like nothing is happening and the needle isn’t moving. Especially then. Keep working towards that goal. Keep taking small steps. Keep giving yourself space for new ideas and creativity. Keep reflecting. Keep having those conversations. Keep listening. Keep learning. Keep giving yourself grace.
Because tomorrow, or next week, or next year, you’re going to look around and say “oh my goodness, I accomplished so much today” before remembering you’ve been making it happen all along. I hope you’ll be so proud of yourself. And I’ll be celebrating with you!
*I have since learned from a Montessori teacher that these questions are two broad for her age. Yes, I’m still listening and learning too.
